INTERVIEW WITH JOCELYN
Are you a hopeless romantic or more pragmatic in your affections?
To my dying breath, I am a hopeless romantic.
You know that sensation in your stomach, the one that feel like it’s doing flip flops when someone you care for reflects back to you?….that! I love that feeling. The luscious energy which drips from lips when we sit idly and lock eyes. The way I swoon when a lover softly kisses my shoulders and envelopes me in his arms…the man who knows to take his time. I don’t shy aware from intimacy, I believe in sharing myself, with the people who deserve me. Genuine connection only happens when we allow ourselves to be open. Doing this can feel vulnerable, and a natural response might be to close off and shut it down, protect the soft spots inside us. But in the moments that we don’t block connection, it’s there where things are left ripe and ready and willing. And that’s a beautiful thing.
What are you currently reading?
I almost exclusively read non-fiction, a lot of socioeconomics, memoirs, and business strategy. Recently however I've picked up the rather scandalous 1955 novel Lolita, by Vladimir Nabokov. The prose is brilliant, titillating and just utterly foul, and it's a detour from my literary routine that I'm rather enjoying.
Cardio vs. Dumbbells?
Yoga. I prefer the physical challenge and mental discipline required in it. Being extra limber is a nice added bonus too.
Where is your favourite place in the world, where do you feel most at home?
So much of who I am is what I experience through the senses; what I see and touch, and taste, and feel. I will not have even digested my last wanderlust adventure before my growing appetite for more begins again…and so I honor that, and I keep seeking out new experiences. I stay moving.
A couple years ago I visited Rio de Janeiro Brazil…and in it I found my version of Valhalla. It was the most immediate and innate knowing; I stepped off the plane and recognized for certain I would live here someday. It’s as though I'd found my tribe and each time I return to Brazil, which is often, it’s feels like I am returning home. I love this South American country. I love the Brazilian men with their brown skin slick with sea salt, I love the music, the undulating language, and rich foods…the staggering humidity and unforgiving land. When we get to visit new places, and pick up the speed and cadence of a city…that’s when you experience it. When I first experienced Brazil, it was all that…but mostly it was the joy. Brazilians are a happy bunch, and it’s damn refreshing to be around.
Are you a cup half full -or- cup half empty kind of girl?
Just refill the cup.
How would you define success, and how well do you measure up to your own definition?
When I first got my start in the sex industry it was in 2007, immediately before the economic collapse of 2008….and I simply needed a job. This was the era before Twitter, before organizations like SWOP-USA were established, and this was before I’d personally ever heard the words escort, companion, courtesan. It is now 2017, and in the years since my introduction to the world of companionship, I have built a reputation which precedes me and a luxury brand that I am deeply proud of.
The Merriam Webster dictionary define success as: "the accomplishment of an aim or purpose."
Most people would probably construe success as recognition. They have reached and had “a successful career” once they’re recognized and respected for their achievements, accolades, clout, their acquired wealth. I think we miss the forest for the trees sometimes, when it comes to our professional and personal endeavors. What is the point of having reached a level of success and the financial gain that comes with it, if we weren’t present in our lives to even enjoy it?
I believe we can manifest destiny. When I ask the universe to give me things, I don’t ask for some of it, I ask for literally everything. They don’t call us dreamers because we sleep...I want prosperity, so I stay hustling. Personally I define success as security. My ambitions and goals, and next venture I am currently working on requires a lot of soul and even more zeros. By my own definition I feel I’m a successful business woman, but I’ll put it like this: I am not ready to retire just yet. I can see the future, and it looks bright.
Pub or Night Club?
swanky hotel lobby bars, rather.
You're heavily tattooed. How do you decide on your pieces?
Can you keep a secret? Then I’ll tell you….I am a complete and utter wimp when it comes to pain! No, really! So much so I get a knot in my gut days in advance of an appointment with an artist, just thinking about the pain involved. Even so, for as long as I can recall, I have wanted to be covered in tattoos. Unofficially, it’s becoming “my thing” that I collect a new piece when I visit a new country… I have tattoos from living legends in places like Osaka, São Paulo, Melbourne, and Malmö…to name a few. The same way in which patrons of the arts collect works for their walls at home, I collect on my body. The artists I get work from from are hard sought after, I often wait upwards of a year sometimes to get an appointment with particular tattooists. Well worth the pain and wait, which you’ll attest to as you lie beside me and trace the outlines on my flesh with your fingertips.
What’s something inexplicable that never fails to turn you on?
Mornings are sacred to me, they're important, the silence is what is important. Waking and laying still...coming back into your body after a night of sleep, no phone, especially no talking...just perfect silence. Perfect silence...except for the way crisp white bedsheets sound sliding across bare skin and crinkling as I roll over to hug the cool side of the pillow to my body and look across the bed to silently meet eyes with a lover on the other side. That sound! The sound of bedsheets in the morning. I love that sound.
What is your favourite love-scene in a movie?
Love Jones, 1997.
Darius gets the invite back to Nina's apartment after the poetry slam...then they slam....and it's that sweet kind of cheesy love making in 90's cinema, which of course didn't hit the spot, ahem, unless it was set to a Maxwell R&B soundtrack. And it was. The most romantic part of this scene however - that man makes her breakfast in the morning. le sigh.
So, can you tie a cherry stem into a knot with your tongue?
Nope. next question...
Healing Crystals, Palo Santo, Alchemy...how do these facets apply to your spiritual life?
I'm a secular humanist with a left lean towards bruxaria. Pragmatically I probably adhere to a Buddhist philosophy more than anything, in my day-to-day because it helps keep me centered. I practice both forms of yoga - the physical discipline and the mental which we also call meditation. But in principle I'm largely against organized religion. I can appreciate that many people need something bigger than themselves to lean on, and I am glad they find peace in whatever they call their higher power. For me I like to believe there is nothing when we die....but before I wax philosophical, you wanted to know about the woo.
I travel so much, and am consistently introduced to spiritual influences in the customs, and rituals and lives of the people I meet. Voodoo in Africa, Candomblé in Brazil, Palmists and Astrology in Nepal and White sage from North American tribes; while Healing crystals and Stones have been used by almost literally every ancient culture...since well before the time of Christ. I like spiritual influences which are based in nature and tradition, things passed down by the ancestors.
I have a large collection of healing crystals, I follow the moon cycles, I collect tarot decks, I frequently burn sage or palo santo to clear energy. I don't base any of my personal or professional movements in any one concept or practice, but I like the richness they bring to my life when I make the time for them in my week.
Recount an experience which has recently brought you joy.
a waffle cone of sesame seed gelato in Tokyo. game changer!
How are you seen by those closest to you?
Favorably I hope. The community of people I call my family, is comprised largely of dear friends, several of whom are colleagues in this fascinating and lush industry, in fact. I read people well, and like to surround myself with people who shoot from the hip, I value sincerity, loyalty. Those closest to me would say I am fastidious, smart, cheeky...dependable, dominant. Then I can only assume they'd continue for another five minutes with other descriptors such as "totally beautiful, awesome, excellent cook, well organized, beautiful, gorgeous, elegant...." so on so forth, etc etc.
What do you want to be when you grow up?
A woman still willing to reinvent herself.
Where to next on your bucket list?
First time I ever left the country, I traveled to Italy with the woman I was dating at the time. For three weeks we wandered our way through Florence, Rome and Naples, devouring everything that crossed our paths. The sounds, the sights…the intoxicatingly fragrant bustling morning street markets selling their blood oranges and buttery slices of Coppa. The Roman men, with their tightly tailored crimson pants and intent gazes…oh the Italian man. Italy changed my life. Not because it’s a beautiful country, though it is, but because it taught me how minuscule my own world is. Up until this inaugural trip I’d always believed international travel was something that required a “reason” to go, and that it was a privilege outside of my reach. As soon as I realized that if you have the desire, and can squirrel-away the funds…that you just, simply...GO. And keep going, as far and as often as possible.
Years later I still love Italy, and Europe in general…but these days I'm most interested in going to the places that aren’t quite as “easy.” Remote villages only reached via rickety vehicles bouncing down muddy off-road passage ways, places with challenging language barriers but an urgent desire to communicate. Places where I have to bear witness to things that make me uncomfortable - poverty, and repression, and political unrest - cities in countries on continents where I am reminded just how resilient and beautiful the human spirit is! I want to travel to the places where the weather is murderous but some brilliant hotelier dreamed up a luxury resort there. I want to see places so stunning and so culturally rich they inspire awe; the type of locales where I stand dumbstruck in silence, because sometimes words just aren't enough. 'I haven’t been everywhere yet, but it’s on my list'.